How depression affects relationships

Depression can have a huge effect on a person's relationships, particularly with people close to them.

Depression may make your friend or relation become negative about themselves. They may think things like “I’m worthless” or “nobody likes me”.  These beliefs can be powerful and may lead to them:

  1. Avoiding you and other people
  2. Becoming unsure of themselves in social situations
  3. Being irritable and angry with you and other people

It is common for people with depression to lose interest in things that they used to enjoy doing.  They may also lose energy and motivation.   It can be frustrating when they suddenly don’t want to do the fun things you used to do together.

Sometimes a person in the middle of a depression may not know what they want. They probably don’t understand their own feelings. For example they may want love and hugs but also feel so overwhelmed that they want to be left alone. They may give you mixed messages which can be confusing for you.

It may be hurtful and frustrating for you, when you are trying to help someone and they are relentlessly negative or refuse to do anything.

The person you love is still there, but they have an illness. Once they start to recover from their depression, these problems will start to ease. By supporting them in their recovery, you may even build a closer and more satisfying relationship with them.

Some things people may say when they are feeling crap

“I want to be alone”
“I don’t want to be alone”
“You don’t understand how I feel”
“Why do I feel like this”
“I don’t want to go out”
“What’s the point”
“I can’t be arsed”
“I don’t know how to tell you how I feel”
“I feel stupid”
“I’m ugly”
“Why do you bother with me, you must have better things to do”
“I’M SO ANGRY!”
“Help me.....I feel really bad”
“I’m not going to the GP”
“There’s nothing wrong with me!”
“I can’t go on”
....or they may say nothing at all